Monday, December 8, 2008

Think again

There is rarely a day that I don't wonder if I am making good choices. I think that may be the nature of the parenting beast. We (parents) are giving all sorts of responsibility that m a y b e some of us thought we had planned for but in reality the plan and the actual amount of decision making just don't match. We go from freedom to goof up our own lives as much as we like with the idea that we can recover from a mistake if we make it to, if-you-don't-make-good-choices-someone-might actually-die, in the wink of an eye. We usually begin OK. We feed our babies, we change our babies, we hold our babies but then things get more complicated. The questions looking for answers are more complex. The answers often wallowing in that grey area of many OK answers but a few better ones. The trick with the grey area is that the better answers don't actually show themselves unless you don't pick them. My answer to this has been to listen to my gut. But (big but) my gut speaks very softly at times. Well my gut wasn't speaking up when a job all but bit me in the butt so I followed the "can't ignore what is dropped in your lap" theory and went after the job. And got it. I am the new parent educator for a parent/child program in our school district. Now, I am pretty sure that I have lost my mind. Ben hasn't been healthy for a whole week in...goodness...weeks? Over a month. That child has not made it through a full week of school in over a month and I got a job? I'm nuts. On the bright side...naa let's just leave it at I'm nuts : )


Ellen said...

I do not think it is the least bit nuts to take that job, I am a big proponent of working; I think that for me, it makes me a better parent. And, being a parent educator sounds like a rewarding, satisfying job. And, unlike some things in life (say, implants), this IS reversible! If it's too much, you just bow out. I'm no "quitter," but I've learned that life is too short to be doing stuff I don't want to do.

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